Being a parent isn't easy. Some days just getting everyone in
your family all together at the same time for dinner can seem
like the "impossible dream". Between after school sports and
clubs and working and errands and carpools, it's not surprising
that almost half of the parents in a recent survey said they
feel a growing distance between themselves and their children.
Today's children have more things to deal with than kids did
even twenty years ago. Drugs, violence, mixed messages in
advertising, peer pressure, packed schedules and outside
activities all add to the pressure they face. On top of that, we
are living in a world of growing unemployment, leaving some
children wondering where their future lies.
Growing up is a continual process filled with regular highs and
lows. As a parent, it's expected. But what can you do to help
through the tough times they might face down the road of life?
Here are some quick tips for those parents that are struggling
to understand their changes, both physical and emotional as they
grow to young adulthood.
Communicate...communicate...communicate. By this I mean proper
communication i.e. the exchange of information which involves
LISTENING as well as speaking. No matter how compelled you might
be, DON'T INTERRUPT THEM! Let them get the weight of their
concerns or problems off their chest without "butting in"
irregardless of how upset you might be at what they are
revealing to you. Yes, they are letting you inside their small,
strange world, so be grateful. It will help to strengthen their
trust in you not to EXPLODE on them and further open the line of
communication between you both.
Show understanding and compassion...remember, you were a child
struggling through the maze of becoming an adult once yourself.
Everything is a drama and their perceived world will crumble
quickly if you trivialize their problem.
Remember that your children are individuals. They each have
their own unique personality traits so don't compare
them...celebrate their uniqueness. To do otherwise is to
belittle their importance.
Above all, LOVE them. Everyone makes mistakes, some more serious
than others but they need to know your love is unconditional.
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